The Pieces of a New Year

I have a large bag of assorted wax paint of various sizes, colors and brands. They are the materials of my dear friend who died last year.

I toss them onto my work table as one would toss the ashes of a family member into the sea. Releasing. Smiling. Gently. The current catches the ashes and folds them into a beautiful design. The trail lifts and falls and in short time the memories become part of a bigger picture that wraps endlessly around the horizon.

This year will be about discernment; choosing the pieces that create beauty. Last year was an opportunity to identify which pieces were important to hold on to and which ones I thanked and then let go of.

I also learned that patience takes courage.

It’s hard to sit with discomfort and trust the calm will come. I double downed on meditation this year and it saved me! Mr. First appreciates my deeply counted breath and we find each other through this energy.

This week I’ve been playing a game with all this color. I take 5 pieces quickly from the pile and set it aside. I don’t think, I feel. I want Feel to guide me in all actions this year. Each set of 5 will become the palette for a painting. I’ve been given a rainbow and I want it to stretch and shine as long, bright and wide as possible.

A few of the selections so far.